The Importance of LGBTQ+ Affirmative Therapy

Mental health matters in the LGBTQ+ community

LGBTQ+ people experience many forms of minority stress and marginalisation because of their identities. This can include things like violence, aggression, hate speech, exclusion, dismissal of identity, and microaggressions in day to day life. The anticipation of these stressors is an additional form of minority stress.

We also usually have some experiences of trauma, and can of course be impacted by the same life stresses and mental health challenges that anyone else might experience. It's all the more important to have safe spaces to talk, process, build resilience, and also to cultivate joy and lean into the things we love about who we are.

If you are LGBTQ+, you probably keep an eye out for negative perceptions or discomfort from others about your identity without even consciously thinking about it. It takes mental and emotional energy to figure out who you can trust and who is safe. Even if you’re out with almost everyone in your life, there will always be new situations to navigate, with new friends, at a new job or even when looking for a therapist. 

 

The importance of an affirmative approach

Heteronormativity is systemic, we are constantly reminded of it even in casual interactions that we might have with strangers. Therapists are not immune to bias and can unintentionally project heteronormative beliefs if they are not careful.

Therapists who take a neutral approach may not realise that their neutrality can reinforce clients' internalised homophobia and shame.

As we know, the relationship between client and therapist is vital to the success of therapy, and LGBTQ+ clients are more likely to feel safe, heard, accepted, supported, and build a strong therapeutic relationship if the therapist has an LGBTQ+ affirmative approach.

This is true regardless of whether you are coming to therapy for identity related reasons, or any other unrelated life problems or mental health challenges.

 

Working with an affirmative therapist

We understand nuances of LGBTQ+ identity that you won’t need to explain, such as

  • That coming out isn’t a one time event
  • That you can experience homophobia / biphobia / transphobia in heterosexual spaces and LGBTQ+ spaces
  • The shame that can come with hiding your identity
  • The risk that comes with sharing your identity publicly in different settings
  • Microaggressions and what they feel like

 

Common issues we might focus on

  • Building self esteem and confidence
  • Building resilience
  • Processing complex experiences and mixed emotions
  • Processing and dealing with the impacts of minority stress 
  • Developing strategies for how we cope with minority stress
  • Reducing the impact of stress/ trauma
  • Balancing visibility and privacy
  • Where to find support and how to build community
  • Being who you are rather than trying to force yourself to fit in 
  • Practicing and working on your boundaries
  • Anything else that is relevant to your life

 

Therapy can also be a space to explore and figure out who you are. You don’t have to be certain about who you are or have all the answers. You don’t need to perform queerness to try to fit in and at the same time you don’t need to hide yourself away. There is no one right way to be queer.

It’s a place where you can start to accept and integrate different parts of yourself, the part that wants to explore, the part that wants to keep you safe, the part that wants to maintain the status quo or please your family. These are all important parts of who you are and they all deserve a voice. 

Maybe you’re comfortable with your identity, and just want a therapist who is part of the LGBTQ+ community, with whom you won’t have to explain every detail of what it means to be LGBTQ+. 

I won’t tell you what to do, because that is a personal choice. But I will affirm your identity and we can explore your options together and figure out what feels right for you, even if it's just the next step forward. You don’t need to have a five year plan or know exactly what you want in order to get started.

I am a bisexual counsellor in the UK, who works with a predominantly LGBTQ+ and neurodivergent client group with a wide range of issues, including identity, life changes, and self esteem. 

If you’re interested in trying counselling with me, you can get in contact here, I offer a free 20 minute introductory call to see if we would be a good fit.

Learn more about me or my work here.